I know what it's like to do everything "right" and still feel like something is fundamentally off.
I've read the books. Done the programs. Journaled, gratitude-listed, vision-boarded, and therapy-ed my way through more than one difficult season. And don't get me wrong... a lot of it helped.
But here's the thing nobody in the self help world wants to say out loud:
You cannot self-help your way out of a broken (flawed, collapsing) system.
And trying to? That's not personal growth. That's just a more sophisticated form of self-blame.
I spent years believing that if I just worked harder on myself, if I optimized enough, healed enough, grew enough... I'd finally feel like my life fit. What I eventually figured out (the hard way), is that the exhaustion I felt wasn't a personal failing. It was a completely logical response to living inside systems that were never designed around what matters most to me.
That realization changed everything.
So What Can You Do?
Getting radically clear on what actually matters to YOU!! Underneath the conditioning, underneath the noise, underneath everyone else's version of your life.
And start making choices, small ones at first, that keep you close to those values.
Here's what I've learned: the way we live our daily lives either props up the systems that are making everything harder, or it slowly starts to dismantle them. That's not overwhelming. That's actually incredibly empowering.
You have more agency than you've been told. It just looks different than what the self help industry has been selling you.
That's what we do here. And it's why I built New World Normal.
What is "normal" anyhow?!
A few years ago the phrase "the new normal" was everywhere.
People were talking about how strange and unsettling the world had become and how badly they wanted to get back to the old normal.
But the more I thought about it, the more something didn't sit right with me.
Because if we were honest... the old normal wasn't all rainbows and sunshine either.
A lot of people were struggling and felt unsupported. We were exhausted, divided, overwhelmed, and constantly told to just work harder and keep up.
Around that same time my personal life was also falling apart.
In the span of a few years I experienced significant trauma, lost two of my closest loved ones, and went through serious health issues that led to three surgeries in four months.
People kept telling me how strong I was.
At first it felt supportive. But eventually I remember thinking:
If one more person tells me how strong I am, I might actually punch them.
Because the truth was... I didn't feel strong. I felt overwhelmed.
What I eventually realized was that I had become really good at performing resilience. But I had never actually learned how to practice it.
Meanwhile the world kept getting louder and more chaotic.
From the outside my life still looked good. I was checking all the boxes of a successful life.
But the edges were fraying. I was one minor inconvenience away from losing my sh!t.
Something had to change.
I realized two things at the same time.
First... ignoring the systems we live in was no longer an option.
And second... I couldn't live my life in a constant state of overwhelm and reaction.
So I started asking different questions.
What actually matters to me? What kind of world am I trying to help create? What expectations had I been following simply because they were "normal"? And what might life look like if I built it around my values instead?
That shift changed everything.
Decisions became easier. My energy returned. I stopped living in reaction mode and started living with intention.
And I noticed that so many women around me were struggling with the same tension.
They cared deeply about the world, but staying informed and engaged was leaving them exhausted and frozen by overwhelm. They didn't want to check out. But they couldn't keep living in constant outrage and anxiety either.
That's the work I do today.
I help women step out of constant reaction mode, reconnect with what matters most to them, and build lives that reflect their values.
Because we don't have to go back to the old normal.
We can create something better.
And it starts with how we choose to live.
Are Ready to Start Questioning Normal in Your Life?
Reclaim Your Energy A Free Guide for Women Drowning in Everyone Else's Priorities - Your first step in questioning normal in your life.
Download this simple framework to figure out what actually deserves your time, energy and attention... so you can stop drowning in everyone else's demands and start focusing on what you can actually control and influence.
Even while the world is spinning out.
FAQS
Is this just more self help?
Short-ish answer? No. And I say that as someone who has consumed more self help content than I care to admit.
The difference is this: most self help puts the entire burden of change on you. If you're struggling it's because you haven't worked hard enough on your mindset, your habits, or your morning routine.
I don't believe that. I believe you're exhausted because you're living inside systems that were never designed around your actual values, and no amount of journaling is going to fix that.
What we do here is different. We start by getting clear on what actually matters to YOU... and build from there. Practical, grounded, and honest about the world we're actually living in.
We do most of it together, because one of the most powerful things that can happen is hearing your own struggle echoed in someone else's voice and realizing you were never as alone in this as you thought.
And we do it all through small, sustainable shifts. Not dramatic overhauls. Not blowing up your life. Just intentional choices, made consistently, that start moving you toward something that actually feels like yours.
I care deeply about what's happening in the world... is this just more avoidant navel-gazing?
Absolutely not... and honestly this question is one of the reasons I do this work.
The women I work with are not looking to opt out of the world. They're looking for a way to stay engaged with it without losing themselves in the process.
Here's what I know to be true: you cannot show up effectively for the things you care about (your community, your family, the causes that matter to you) when you're running on empty and drowning in everyone else's expectations.
Taking care of yourself isn't a retreat from the world. It's how you build the capacity to actually change it.
The goal here was never to help women feel good while ignoring what's happening around them. It's to help them get clear enough, grounded enough, and intentional enough to show up for the world they actually want to help create.
That's not navel gazing. That's how real, sustainable change actually happens... one intentional woman at a time.
I'm not sure I'm ready for coaching... where do I start?
Good news!! You don't have to be ready. You just have to be curious.
Most of the women who find their way here aren't sure they're ready for coaching either. They just know something feels off and they're tired of waiting for it to fix itself.
The best place to start is for free, and there are two easy ways to do that:
Listen to the podcast: New World Normal is the easiest place to start. Just hit play and see if the conversations resonate. No commitment, no sign up, just honest conversations about the world we're living in and the lives we actually want to build.
Grab the free guide: Reclaim Your Energy: A Guide for Women Drowning in Everyone Else's Priorities. It's a simple framework for figuring out what actually deserves your time and energy, and you can start using it today.
Or come hang out in the community: Questioning Normal, Rewriting the Rules in Midlife is a free space where women are having honest conversations about exactly what you're going through.
Either way, no pressure, no commitment, no "you need to be at a certain place" to belong here. Find Links for all the free offerings on the "Work With Me" Page
Start where you are. That's always enough.
What is the New World Normal podcast about?
New World Normal is a podcast for thoughtful humans who are done with all the noise and ready to think differently about the world they're living in, and the life they actually want to build.
Each episode is part honest conversation, part permission slip. We talk about the systems shaping our lives, the norms worth questioning, and what it actually looks like to live with intention in a world that makes that very, very hard.
Hosted by Debbie Harrell , with a mix of solo episodes and conversations with guests who are rethinking how we live, work, and care for each other.
Find it wherever you listen to podcasts. HERE
What happens inside the free community?
Questioning Normal, Rewriting the Rules in Midlife is a free community for women who are done living on autopilot and ready to do something about it.
Currently located in a private Facebook Group. It's a little quiet in there right now, because we are in the process of escaping Meta ... but there are big things coming!! This community will be the first to know when they land.
In the meantime you'll find a seasonal book club, occasional free workshops from Debbie and Guests Experts, pop-up challenges, and first access to new podcast episodes and offers before anyone else.
Consider this your chance to get in and help create something impactful for you and others <3
